Thursday, 5 August 2010

How do we feel?

To be honest right about now all I am feeling is guilty that I am not more picture-perfect-excited if that makes any sense? I'm trying to process it but it's a bit much for now I guess, it's just like it's a new person I have to picture in my head than the one I have done so far, IYKWIM?

Another thing that became crystal clear to us both the second she said "girl" was that we will be trying for another IVF as soon as we can. I didn't think we would and I think that if we would have had a boy I'd be slower to think that way but this way it feels wrong to leave a girl alone in the world. All part of the irrational thought brigade

I figure much of my apprehension stems from how I only raised my brother, he is my only model for this, I haven't even been around babies and children of friends, much less around little girls so I have very little in the way of idea of what I am meant to do with her... I know how to be motherly and friendly and this and that with a boy, is it the same thing? Would another level of closeness and friendship be required, the proverbial mother-daughter tie? See I never had one with my mother and so I wouldn't know... If anything I have been her mother and hence my only reference of parenting a female is disastrous LOL

The Viking is ok, he looked disappointed the first minute or so but then his face beamed and he was all hurt when I implied that maybe he didn't want a girl. He's now making plans for rifles and rocking chairs on porches and just a minute ago sent me this, saying he needs to buy it for her:

No comments: